The Big Red Purse

I am not a *purse person*, much less a *red purse person*. To me purses are purely utalitarian objects and if there was a way I could avoid carrying them, I would. My purses are mostly black with a brown thrown in for good measure.

I wasn't always like that. In my misspent (overspent?) youth, I had shoes in every color and purses to match - which contributed greatly to my former $32,000 credit card debt that thankfully has been completely paid off.

Anyway, I would carry a different purse every day depending on the outfit and shoes I wore. Today I have one black *office purse*, regardless of what I wear, and sometimes I even use it for non-office activities because everything is already in there. When it would die from sheer exhaustion, I would buy a new black office purse and work it to death.

Until yesterday.

Yesterday a "purse lady" was at my office - she set up shop in front of the company cafeteria. I had been telling my husband for a while that I needed a new purse for work, as mine was falling apart after over a year of daily use. Now, my office purse has to be huge because of the ridiculous amount of crap I carry with me every day. I wish "Let's Make a Deal" was still on - I would SO win the part at the end where Monty Hall would give money to people who had weird stuff in their purse.

Seriously, in my work purse in addition to the usual stuff, I carry measuring tape, a set of mini screw-drivers, a corkscrew, a book, a nail care kit, a pill bottle full of over the counter stuff, several packs of mint tea, a stain-remover pen, a bunch of give-away pens, match boxes, old ticket stubs and who knows what else.

So I'm perusing the purses and I see a big red bag that was perfect for my load o' crap - except it was red, not black. I asked the purse lady if she had it in black. She said that it only came in red, but I should get it anyway. I told her I wasn't a red purse kind of girl. Well, she went into full tilt sales mode! She told me that red was the *new black*, that I could wear it with any color because purses didn't have to match anymore! Is that true? When did that happen? And then she tells me, "You're young, you can carry a red purse". Well that was it! What can I say? She had me at "you're young"!

So I bought this beautiful big red purse for $35 (original price was $50). And now it's sitting in my bedroom, looking at me. Daring me to use it. Will I?

I don't know.