Vacation Styles

Some of you may know that Hubby and I met online back in 1995 before it was a "thing", we met in an AOL chat room. He lived in PA and I lived in Miami, so our entire "courtship" occurred by telephone back when there were way fewer cell phones and no free long distance plans - so you can imagine the cost!

Despite the soaring phone bills really all we had was talking, so for over 2 years we talked at least once, often twice a day. So, we had a lot of time to talk about all the stuff you *should* talk about before getting married - such as politics, views on child rearing, views on family, how we'd handle finances, etc. So much so that when we took our pre-wedding retreat (a Catholic thing) we had already talked about literally *every issue* they told us we should discuss before we got married.

You know one that the retreat people didn't mention and we didn't discuss? Vacation Styles. Do you view out of town vacations as an opportunity to relax, if visiting family just hanging out with them at home watching TV, sleeping in late every day, etc.? Or, do you view them as opportunities to go out with or without an agenda) and explore places you don't know or return to favorite places, do some sightseeing, just walk around and soak in the place?

Someone should have suggested that we discuss it. So I am hereby advising any and all people who are planning to get married to discuss it. It doesn't have to be a deal breaker if you have differing styles, but at least everyone will know how to set expectations. We've been married 14 years and I'm still struggling with it.

In case you haven't guessed, I'm the second style described above. David...not so much. So what usually happens is as follows:

I want to go somewhere - anywhere really - and I tell him. He tells me he doesn't want to go. I try to convince him to go. He still doesn't want to go. I get all passive-aggressive. He gets pissed and says something like "FINE! We'll go, let's just go!", clearly not wanting to go. I get pissed and tell him to forget it, I don't want to go if he doesn't want to go because then it wouldn't be any fun.

WOO HOO Vacation fun!

Everything had been fine until now because with the holiday hoo-ha and his brother and family in from Texas it was reasonable to want to stay in. They flew back home today. So, we went through this exercise earlier tonight. We wound up going to dinner nearby *but* to a restaurant to which we'd never been...a compromise of sorts.

Tomorrow we're mostly staying in so he can watch football with hometown friends and I'm perfectly fine with that. It'll be fun.

Then there's Monday...(sigh)

What's your vacation style? Is it compatible with your SO's?

I've Been Saying It For Years

[Yes, I'm repeating the cartoon I used on 'Toon Tuesday because it goes perfectly with the subject of this post.]

According to this article by Andres Oppenheimer and numerous news reports, Fidel Castro has pretty much contradicted his brother Raul who is supposed to be the new President, Commander-in-Chief, Galactic Overlord, Chief Cook and Bottle washer, etc.

Apparently Raul recently said something along the lines that

Cuban leaders would be willing to sit down with their U.S. counterparts and discuss "everything, everything, everything," including human rights, freedom of the press and expression, and political prisoners.

That's awesome, right? President Obama has already eased restrictions on family travel and remittances to Cuba and it has been speculated that this would eventually lead to at least some easing of the 47 year-old US embargo against Cuba. There would have to be negotiations with and concessions from the Cuban government of course.

So now Fidel has said:

that Obama had ''misinterpreted'' Raúl's remarks about Cuba's willingness to discuss human rights issues. According to Fidel, Raúl meant to say that Cuba would free political prisoners if the United States frees five Cubans convicted in the U.S. of spying for Cuba.

I, and many others much better versed on the subject, have maintained for decades now that Fidel Castro does not want the US embargo to be lifted. The embargo has served as Castro's perennial bogeyman, the cause of all of Cuba's problems - most importantly it has served as his excuse for the regime's failed economic policies.

Cuban propaganda espouses that the embargo has kept medicines and food from the Cuban people, but there has been humanitarian aid from charity agencies into Cuba for years. the problem is that the government misused and misdirected much of it to suit their purposes such as what is known as "medical tourism". Often medicines and medical equipment from the United States was funneled to hospitals specifically devoted to medical tourism because it generated revenue for the government. Meanwhile, the people of Cuba were having to endure abysmal conditions in "the people's hospitals".

So of course, the last thing the old guard of the revolutionary government wants is the lifting of the embargo. Once that happens anything and everything will be available for *purchase* - but, wait - there's no money! The jig will be up...everyone will see the emperor indeed has no clothes.

As Norberto Fuentes, biographer and former friend of Fidel Castro, told Oppenheimer:

Fidel has sabotaged every U.S. effort to improve ties with Cuba over the past 50 years and he needs confrontation with Washington to justify his regime's absolute hold on power.

I think Fidel is trying to sabotage this as well. Will he succeed yet again? Only if we let him.

Let US citizens and residents travel to Cuba whether or not they have family there. Let us go with our books and our movies and our music. Let us flood the island with dollars and ideas. Let the people of Cuba finally learn the truth about their half century of suffering and need.

Don't let Fidel Castro continue to dictate (pun intended) our failed 50 year policy towards Cuba.

The Lola Shuffle - The "DANGER - I Have Access to a Free Frequent Flier Round-Trip Ticket to Europe and a Passport" Edition

I'm about ready to take a cab to MIA walk up to the American Airlines ticket counter and buy a ticket to the next plane to anywhere in Europe. Seriously.

I don't want to be in charge of things, handle things or plan things. No. I don't want to talk to the nice case manager from the home health care company who is being harassed by the thugs who call themselves my health insurance company. I don't want to think about when the frickin' frackin' car will be ready to get out of the repair shop or how much it's going to cost or if the mechanic was able to get a used part for the car seat that isn't working right. I don't want to think about how to distribute my 401K, which by the way will no longer be matched by my employer because the economy is f'd up. I don't want to think about how Hubby will endure the plane ride to his sister's wedding at the end of March.

I just don't.

Instead I want to listen to what Lola has shuffled up - because see, *she's* in charge of that - I have nothing at all to do with what comes up. So, go on Lola, shuffle away please. I'll just lay here under my desk rocking in the fetal position while sucking my thumb.

1. Maybe Baby - Buddy Holly
2. That's the Way of the World - Earth, Wind & Fire
3. Swing - Trace Adkins
4. This Old House - Brian Setzer Orchestra
5. Jungle Love - Steve Miller Band
6. Time - Hootie and the Blow Fish
7. Life in the Fast Lane - The Eagles
8. Everlasting Love - Gloria Estefan
9. Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
10. I Never Promised You a Rose Garden - Martina McBride

Have a great weekend - maybe I'll see you at the airport!

Just so you know...

Sarah Palin's "pro-America areas of the country" and accusations of Socialism, along with some conservatives' "real Americans" crap is really, really pissing me off! So I offer a cartoon and an article.

(Scroll past the cartoon for my comment.)


FYI - The statement in the cartoon bubble is what Joseph N. Welch, the the head attorney for the United States Army while it was under investigation by Joseph McCarthy's Senate Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations for Communist activities, said to Joseph McCarthy.

Things That Make You Say Hmmm

The Bail Out

If you don't agree with the Paulson bail out plan, write to your Senators and Representatives. It's your money!

My problems with "the plan" as presented by Paulson and Bernake:

• The lack of accountability and oversight for which Paulson and company are asking
• It needs a solution for people who are losing their homes - I like the idea of a moratorium on foreclosures
• I don't want golden parachutes for executives who basically messed up in doing their jobs

Dubyuh's Olympic Interview

Here's a link to the transcript of Dubyuh's interview with Bob Costas yesterday. Here are some excerpts (bolding by me), followed by my comments:

"Q And winning 101 to 70. Our time here is limited. We'll get to as much as we can. The Opening Ceremonies were glorious. There's much to admire about China's people, China's culture, and its present accomplishments. But this remains an authoritarian state

THE PRESIDENT: That's true.

Q -- with an abysmal human rights record. In the long run, is China's rise irreconcilable with America's interests?

THE PRESIDENT: No. In the long run, America better remain engaged with China, and understand that we can have a cooperative and constructive, yet candid relationship. It's really important for future Presidents to understand the relationship between China and the region, and it's important to make sure that America is engaged with China -- even though we may have some disagreements."

ME - What? Ummmm...what about CUBA???

***********************

"THE PRESIDENT: ...I've met with Hu Jintao a lot since I have been the President. And, yes, I had a full range -- listen, we agree with them on a lot of things. And we disagree with them on things. And that's the way the relationship is going to be. It needs to be, as I mentioned, constructive and cooperative. "

ME - What? Ummmm...what about CUBA???

***********************

"Q But given China's growing strength and America's own problems, realistically how much leverage and influence does the U.S. have here?

THE PRESIDENT: First of all, I don't see America having problems. I see America as a nation that is a world leader, that has got great values. And leverage is -- I don't think you should look at the relationship as one of leverage. I think you ought to look at the relationship of one of constructive engagement where you can find common areas, like North Korea and Iran, but also be in a position where they respect you enough to listen to your views on religious freedom and political liberty."

ME - Denial much?

***********************

"Q If these Olympics are as successful as they are shaping up to be, most people believe this only further legitimizes the ruling party in the minds on most Chinese citizens. And even absent true liberty as we understand it, the lives of hundreds of millions of Chinese people are much better than they once were. Therefore, what's the party's incentive to reform?

THE PRESIDENT: Well, first of all, if you're a religious person, you understand that once religion takes hold in a society it can't be stopped. And secondly, I think the Olympics are going to serve as a chance for people to come and see China the way it is, and let the Chinese see the world and interface and have the opportunity to converse with people from around the world. This is a very positive development, in my view, for peace."

ME - ??? Uh what? What does religion have to do with anything Bob Costas said? I'm thinking maybe Costas was supposed to ask a question about religion and for the sake of time skipped it, but Dubyuh had already memorized his answers so he answered a question that wasn't actually asked.

***********************

"Q As you attempt to press these points with them, do you find Hu Jintao not just warm toward you personally, but is he receptive? Do you sense any movement?

THE PRESIDENT: It's hard to tell. I mean, it's -- all I can tell you is, is that it is best to be in the position where a leader will listen to you. I went to church here, and I'm sure the cynics say, well, you know, it was just a state-sponsored church. On the other hand -- and that's true. On the other hand, it gave me a chance to say to the Chinese people, religion won't hurt you, you ought to welcome religious people. And it gave me a chance to say to the government, why don't you register the underground churches and give them a chance to flourish? And he listened politely. I can't read his mind, but I do know that every time I met with him I pressed the point. "

ME: I wonder how the translator for Mr. Jintao handled that answer because it's barely coherent in English.

***********************

"THE PRESIDENT: Absolutely. Yes, there's a great connection. You know, I can remember riding my bike around Beijing in 1975, and it is --

Q Only bikes then, just about.

THE PRESIDENT: -- unbelievable how far this has changed. I mean, it is -- and he feels the same way. And we were honored yesterday when the President, Hu Jintao, invited my dad and me and Laura and my sister and my daughter, my brother, for dinner. It was a -- lunch. It was just a great gesture of kindness."

ME: What?

The mind wobbles...

Compare and Contrast

(Thanks to South Florida Daily Blog for the "death toll" image)

March 24, 2008

vs

May 1, 2003

'Nuff said.

Your Tax Dollars at Work

Apparently we haven't spent enough money on the frickin' frackin' baseball steroid crap and really there isn't anything more important on which to spend our money. Education, health care, the environment, alternative energy sources? Pish posh! None of those are as important as baseball and whether or not some pudgy retired baseball guy took steroids a hundred years ago!

Here I am sitting at work, minding my own business, writing release notes and I am accosted by BREAKING NEWS!!! The FBI has launched an investigation on whether Roger Clemens lied about using steroids. Here's some breaking news for you: I don't give a damn!

And the best part - the FBI is doing it on the request of the US Congress! I guess a committee of the House of Representatives of the United States of America has nothing better to do than sit around and talk about baseball, and now they want the people over at the FBI to sit around and talk about baseball. Except since it's an *investigation* several highly-trained and highly-paid FBI investigators will probably have to travel - at our expense of course - to investigate this oh-so-important issue.

Did I mention I don't give a damn? As far as I'm concerned all of them can be injecting steroids into their eyeballs while they're sitting in the dugout waiting for their turn to bat. That isn't a GOVERNMENTAL ISSUE. Let the MLB people investigate it if they want to - but the government? Really?

What's next will there be a Senate panel to investigate whether or not Britney Spears is a whack-a-loon? Or a bi-lateral commission on Paris Hilton's movie career?

The mind wobbles.

The Lola Shuffle - The "I Watched a Disturbing Rap Video This Morning" Edition

I mean really! It involves Snoop and 50 Cent (aka "Fitty") and some other people I don't know but apparently are big in the "Gangsta Rap" world.

This had to be the most blatantly vile, misogynistic, sexist, crude, tacky rap video ever. The song is called P.I.M.P. (Remix). Go ahead and check out the lyrics while I throw up in my mouth a little bit. Be warned, there is nasty language in there, but the "bad" words aren't really the problem - it's the whole point of the song. Y'all know I'm no prude, but come on!

This wouldn't bother me so much except that the video was playing at 7:45 a.m. on one of the digital video channels. Now, yes most of the bad language wasn't heard, but really it was the images that got to me. Of course there a plethora of scantily-clad beautiful girls of all races and sizes writhing all over the men, some of them thrusting their rumps into the camera (?), etc. But at one point there was a guy holding a leash with three attached to it! What the hell?

The worst part is, the beat is awesome. If you don't listen to the words, it's a great party song - which makes it all the more insidious. I guess I'm officially old now...I just don't get it. Oy, vey, the mind wobbles.

OK, that's it now I'll let Lola shuffle up some music that promises to be *pimp free*!

1. Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da - The Beatles
2. Me and Julio Down By The School Yard - Paul Simon (Genius! One of my favorite Simon songs)
3. The Chain - Fleetwood Mac
4. Be My Life's Companion - The Mills Brothers (Their voices are like velvet...)
5. Don't Know Why - Norah Jones (Her first hit - rememebr how refreshing she was? Easy, elegant, beautiful voice. Great song.)
6. Let the River Run - Carly Simon (Awesome - probably my favorite Carly Simon song!)
7. My Baby Just Cares For Me - Nina Simone (Lola is on a roll - phenomenal rendition of this song. Again, what a voice!)
8. Whenever, Wherever - Shakira (Wow - this hadn't played in a while - I lke it.)
9. Lonely People - America
10. I Would Die 4 U - Prince (Perfect! I loves me some diminutive purple one! These lyrics are great...and by the way, how many years before text messaging did Prince start writing that way?)

Lola, that was wonderful, it was exactly what I needed! Good job...

Have a wonderful weekend!

Donors Choose

Some of you may have noticed the Donors Choose thingy on the upper left of my Blog. If you have contributed - thank you so much! I love the fact that they support projects requested by teachers targeting specific needs.

After I selected the Harlem Renaissance project for my challenge I saw that as of September, Florida now has some projects in the program. As I was browsing through them I found that there is a middle school in Miami that doesn't have frickin' frackin' dictionaries for the students! We're talking about kids to whom English is a second language! How are they supposed to learn a language without damned dictionaries?

It's been deemed an "F" school within Dubyuh's NCLB debacle. Gee - ya think maybe they're an "F" school because the kids don't have dictionaries? I'm just saying...

How is it possible that a public school in the United States of America doesn't have dictionaries for students? There are layers and layers of well paid to highly paid administrative staff at the school board level - I'm not talking teachers, I'm talking bureaucrats - with phenomenal benefits and retirement packages but the children in the schools don't have dictionaries.

This is the stuff that makes the mind wobble!

The "N" Word and Me

On Saturday afternoon hubby and I went to a a good friend's house to watch the University of Miami vs. Oklahoma game - we lost horribly.

Anyway, as it turned out I wound up being the only woman present, in addition to hubby there were three other men. This has never been a problem for me, as I have always been comfortable in the company of men. Of the remaining three men two are good friends of mine and the other (a close friend on one of the other guys) an acquaintance of over 15 years - we see each other regularly at parties, casual gatherings, etc.

So, I wind up sitting next to the acquaintance - a professional, fairly reasonable, 45 year-old man, father of two. In discussing the new UM coach, who is Black, and his newly implemented disciplinary tactics, this guy drops the "N" bomb on me as part of a joke! Obviously he has never heard me use that word before, nor has he heard anyone else use that word around me - what the hell makes him think I would be OK with that? What is wrong with people?

Since my stunned silence was not the reaction he expected to his stupendous display of humor he actually said to me "Did you hear what I said?" to which I icily replied "Yes I did and I really don't want to hear it again." But, I don't think he understood that I was offended.

What more could I have done? How could I have made it clear to him that I don't appreciate that kind of language without making everyone else uncomfortable? In the past (when I was younger and much more hot-headed) I asked someone who used that type of language to leave my home, but it was *my* home. And once at a dinner party another person said the word and I excused myself from the table and went to another room - thankfully we were having dessert, but that guy definitely understood why I had left.

Why would someone assume people are OK with this? Has it not been made clear enough that a significant number of people are offended by such language? Have we not yet created a zeitgeist where such people would at least curtail their use of hate speech unless they were sure they were speaking to like-minded individuals?

The mind wobbles...

Sign of the Times

This is today's Miami Herald editorial cartoon, by Pulitzer prize-winning cartoonist Ed Morin.